Posts

I just don't know

I just don't know 8/27/2017 I guess you can tell by the title, that this is going to be a bummer post. You would be correct in that assumption. I will try to make this short and to the point. Right now I am dealing with high Blood pressure and my fasting numbers have been way too high. My shoulder is still locked up and from what I understand it may take two years or so to break it free.  I'm on B.P meds but it's still too high and i don't know why other than it could be from my weight gain. As for my Blood sugar...I don't know why it so high now. It was almost 200 yesterday morning and I know I did not eat anything that would spike it so fucking high. It's frustrating but I know it's my own fault. I don't know why I lost control over myself. Sometimes I just want to give up and let this shit kill me and be done with it. It's not what I will do but it is how I feel at times. Sometimes you just don't fucking know. What's worse... sometimes...

Just checking in

Just checking in. 7/5/2017 Greetings all, I just wanted to check in and keep this blog moving. I go in to see D-Rex next week and I am sure my A1C is still good but I am sure I'll get the lecture about my weight gain. I'm okay with that. We all need a boot up the ass once in a while. I know I do. My right shoulder is doing much better but still not where it should be. I'm sure that is my fault because I am not doing the exercises as I should be. I've been making really bad decisions when it comes to my diet and drinking too much beer. I am surprised my A1C isn't out of control. I think I either need to get my shit together or just stop with the meds and going to see doctors. Just give the fuck up is what I feel like doing. Not a smart thing to be thinking about I know. Feelings often do not match the logical side of our thinking. I don't know what to do. All I know is everything seems to be caving in on me and I feel powerless to stop it. I am sure I am not...

Nothing New and always Old.

Nothing New and always Old. 6/21/2017 Greetings all, Just wanted to post something to keep in touch. So far I am still doing these exercises at home to help break my shoulder free. It is getting better but still a ways to go. I go back in to see The Seeker the 26th of July and maybe then I will know more what the next step will be. Right now I am clueless. Which is no big news to me. All I can do is what he needs me to do at home and perhaps it will improve enough to move forward, We shall see.

My shoulder is Frozen and now I want Ice Cream.

My shoulder is Frozen and now I want Ice Cream. May 7th 2017 Greetings all, as you may or may not know, I have been having some mobility issues with my right arm. My doctor referred me to a specialist to see if I needed surgery. Last Friday I went in to see a Steven Seeker to get his opinion on what is going on with my shoulder. He explained that I had what is called "Frozen Shoulder." He told me that it was Diabetes related. So I will be doing physical therapy for a undecided time to regain use of my right arm again. I am set to see Seeker again in a few weeks. I have to be honest. I still do not understand how this happen. I have no real idea of how my Type 2 Diabetes plays into this. It's a bit confusing but that is nothing new with Diabetes. In other news... my morning readings has been much improved. I'm still fat but I won't let that drag me down. I have been trying hard to be a bit more proactive and less about wanting to give up. I've even decided...

A NO Bread Zone and I want Pizza!

A NO Bread Zone and I want Pizza! 3/21/2017 Greetings world, So my Visit to D-Rex wasn't so bad. My blood work for the most part was pretty good although my Blood Pressure is up a bit and when I came in I was just getting over the damn cold. Of course I was put back on B.P medicine and something to help me with this cold. I am hoping in July I will have lost enough weight to not need the B.P med any longer when I go back to see D-Rex. A couple of weeks ago I think... I started to stop eating bread completely to get my fasting numbers back in check. So far it is working nicely. This process should help me lose a bit of weight as well. I think once I am back to 100% health... I am going to start things off by using the treadmill again. I'm not ready for weights yet and it may be a while. I may need to go into physical therapy in order to get full use of my right arm again. Oh yes, I found out yesterday I have a Urinary track infection and I am now on antibiotics for a couple ...

Latest whine fest!

Latest whine fest! 3/13/2017 Greetings all, So here is a recap on what I have been whining about. I gained my weight back, Blood pressure is up and fear of my A1c being too high again. I have not talked with D-Rex yet but I do have the results of last weeks blood work. As of right now my A1C is a 6.5.  As some of you know, 6.5 is a tiny bit out of acceptable range. Far, FAR better than I thought it was going to be. I don't think Rex is going to change my meds again so I will need to change my eating habits again. Or in my case... go BACK to eating as I know I should. This should bring that number down. I have not eaten and bread in the last few days and I should say... it isn't easy. I LOVE me some bread! By not allowing myself bread my fasting readings are starting to look much better. In time I hope I can lower my A1C and my weight by laying off all carbs. I see D-Rex this week so I will update you guys on how much I was yelled at or beaten. LOL! I know my tone with thi...

Falling Hard

Falling Hard 3/2/2017 For the last few months I have in a way... given up on my health. My weight has gone up a great deal and my Blood sugar is up again. I'm due next week to do my blood work for my D-Rex visit the following week. I am pretty sure my A1C will be too high. I am sure he will give me hell for it. Rightfully so. I can't defend what ism't defend-able. The weight gain bothers me but it's my A1C that concerns me the most. I guess if that was true I would not have allowed myself to go back to where I started. I've fallen hard and this time I am not sure if I can get back up again. I understand how ridiculous I sound but I'm just trying to be honest and understand myself a bit. Perhaps I am just fucking lazy? I wish I knew. I'm sure some will read this and think I am seeking attention. Perhaps they may be right. It isn't my intention. i suppose I should just get over myself and get up and do what I need to do. All I can do is try.